Have some free text fields in your application that you wish you could search efficiently? Tried using some methods before but found out that they just cannot match the performance needs of your customers? Do I have one weird trick that will solve all your problems? Don’t you already know!? All I do is bring great solutions to your performance pitfalls!
As usual, if you want the TL;DR (too long; didn’t read) version, skip to the end. Just know you are hurting my feelings.