I think you are asking: "If I have an object open in one process, and another process updates that object or its corresponding row, what's the best way for the first process to make sure that it has the latest version of the data?"
I recommend using %Reload(). It makes it clearer to another developer what you're actually doing. A quick glance at the %Reload() code makes me think that it would be faster than killing the object and calling %OpenId() to reopen it.
Of course, you might want to make use of Concurrency options so that if you have an object open in one process, other processes are prevented from updating it.